


Help I'm Alive

by Strump



Series: Fraywood Brotp [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Brother-Sister Relationships, Brotp, Clary Fray & Alec Lightwood Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-06-06 02:59:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15185249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Strump/pseuds/Strump
Summary: “What song is this?”“Oh, let me check.” She picked up her phone from beside her, startled by the sudden words. “It’s called Help I’m Alive by the band Metric.” Alec nodded his head slowly, fiddling with his thumbs on his lap.“I like it.”orAlec finds comfort from the last person he'd ever expected after he finds out about his dad cheating.





	Help I'm Alive

**This is set right after Alec finds out that his dad cheated on his mom. Some sad!Alec and protective!Clary!**

            He couldn’t sleep. Not that it was surprising after the bomb that his mother had dropped on him. For all of the respect he’d afforded his father, he actually wasn’t too surprised about all of this. His parents had been falling apart for a while now, it was only a matter of time before something like this happened. He only wished that it hadn’t happened the way that it did. He wished his mom wasn’t in so much pain about it (despite the fact that she refused to show it).

            His phone showed the numbers 3:37am, bright white and glaring at him like a reminder, or a taunt. He knew he should be in bed, knew that he had an institute to run, but he’d laid in his bed for hours to no avail.

            As he wandered towards the garden, he suddenly heard soft music. He turned the corner, startled to see Clary sitting among the plants. A witchlight sat next to her, a small speaker at her feet, and her head was bent over her sketchbook. He watched silently as she reached up, brushing bright red locks out of her eyes with charcoal-stained fingers. Alec sighed before shrugging softly to himself and meandering towards her. She glanced up, green eyes sparkling in the light, before giving him a soft smile and looking back to her sketch.

            Silently, the boy took a seat next to her, sighing softly and leaning back against the small half wall Clary had chosen to sit in front of.

            “What are you drawing?” He suddenly asked, softly so as not to disturb the soft calm between the two of them. She smiled sadly and tilted the sketchbook towards him. He was startled to see Valentine’s face staring back at him.

            “Oh.” Was his only response as she nodded once and hunched back over the sketch.

            Alec glanced around, finding himself more at peace within the plants and, surprisingly, with Clary at his side than he had in days. He could feel his tense shoulders finally start to relax, and he let out a deep breath, allowing all of the tension in his body to melt away.

            “Is everything okay?” Clary asked, closing her sketchbook, and turning to look at the black-haired boy. He stared forward, a mute frown dominating his face. “I know I’m probably the last person that you want to talk to, but you know that you can, right?” She nudged his shoulder softly.

            “What song is this?” He responded, seemingly ignoring the words she had said.

            “Oh, let me check.” She picked up her phone from beside her, startled by the sudden words. “It’s called Help I’m Alive by the band Metric.” Alec nodded his head slowly, fiddling with his thumbs on his lap.

            “I like it.” He murmured. Clary giggled softly.

            “It’s a cool song. I love Champagne Enema or whatever they are now, but it’s always nice to hear stuff like this too.”

            “Champagne _what_?” Alec demanded, turning his head to look at her. Clary’s laughing green eyes shone back at him.

            “Simon’s band. Before he became…” She trailed off, frowning. Alec nodded his head, turning back around to stare at the plants before him.

            “My dad cheated on my mom.” He suddenly said and was surprised at the pain that came with the admission. It was the first time he’d said it aloud. Clary turned to look at him, nodding to show that she was listening, but didn’t speak. “I don’t know how I feel about it.” He continued. “I think I’m disappointed in him. I respected him so much, but now…” He paused, licking his lips, and trying to collect his thoughts. “Part of me isn’t so surprised about it, though.” Clary nodded, but Alec wasn’t looking. “I’m worried about my mom. And Izzy.” He shook his head, surprised by the lump that was forming in his throat.

            Clary reached out, putting her hand hesitantly on his shoulder. He looked up at her, tears shining in his eyes.

            “I suppose neither of us won the dad lottery, huh?” She asked softly. Alec cracked a small smile, even as a tear rolled down his cheek. “Alec, it’s okay to just be sad for you. You don’t have to be sad for your mom, or for Izzy. If you’re upset, then that’s okay. But you need to admit that to yourself.” She smiled meaningfully at him. “There was nothing you could have done to change it. You’re a wonderful son, and a wonderful friend. A wonderful brother. One of the most dedicated and loyal people I know. And sometimes, you have to break. You can’t just be strong all the time.”  As if the words had broken some sort of dam inside of him, Alec couldn’t stop the tears that came down his cheeks. One after another, faster and faster, until he was full on crying. Clary turned, grasping his shoulders, and pulling him forward. He didn’t resist, surprisingly, as he allowed his head to fall onto her shoulder, his arms winding around her and squeezing. “I’m here for you, Alec. I promise.” She whispered, holding him tightly as he shook with silent sobs in her arms.

            Alec allowed himself to feel sad about his parents coming divorce, the fact that his father had betrayed not only his mother but his children too, for the first time. He allowed his feelings to come out, the anger and sadness that had caused his unrest for days now. The whole reason he hadn’t been able to sleep was because of this, and he’d found comfort and the words he needed to hear with someone he had never expected. It was almost kind of funny, he thought. He could never have imagined being in this position before; he had hated her when she’d first shown up in their lives.

            They stayed there long enough that Clary’s legs, folded under her awkwardly, became numb, but she did not move. Still she sat, holding this boy that had only ever seemed stoic and strong to her. It was only when Alec pulled away from her that she dared to adjust, sighing in relief as she fell to her butt. Alec wiped the last few tears from his cheeks and sniffled. Clary’s music played softly, her sketchbook forgotten on the ground next to it. Alec looked over at her, but she was staring at the ground with a sad smile on her face.

            “Thanks.” He rasped. The girl turned towards him, grinning.

            “Did you just say thank you? To me?” She giggled, almost evilly. Alec’s eyes narrowed.

            “If you tell anyone about this, you’re dead Fray.” He muttered, angrily. Clary’s smile fell, and she shook her head, her eyes wide.

            “I would never, Alec. You have to know that. What happened tonight will stay between you and me.” She said earnestly. Alec nodded, chewing on his lip.

            “I’m going to bed.” He announced suddenly, standing up. Clary looked up at him from the ground, smiling softly. “You should get some sleep too. Don’t think we haven’t noticed those bags under your eyes.” He stared down at her with a soft look of concern. Clary nodded, smiling.

            “I will, Alec. Promise.” She replied. He nodded and turned, heading for the door.

            “Oh, and Clary?” He turned back around to see her standing up and collecting her things.

            “Hmm?” She asked, looking up at him.

            “Seriously. Thanks for tonight. You can come to me if you need anything, okay?” He assured her. Clary nodded, grinning.

            “I will Alec, thanks.”

            He would never tell anyone that he went back to his room and looked up that song, Help I’m Alive, and he would never _ever_ tell anyone that his last thought before he fell asleep was that maybe Clary Fray wasn’t as bad as he had originally thought.


End file.
